whythailand.net

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

Cobra Gold is an annual joint military exercise held between Thai and American forces. The US Navy comes to Pattaya.

First
This exercise generally starts late April and usually runs through most of May.

However, no one knows exactly when the navy will arrive, including the sailors themselves. Anyone who tells you differently is WRONG. The way the navy works is to keep everyone in the dark about where they are or when they will be at any location.

There is a plan BUT it gets changed all the time and without notice. Of the many rumors that they are coming on such and such a date 99% are wrong. You are better off flipping a coin rather than listening to rumors.

Second
It makes little difference except around Walking Street when they are in town. If a carrier group arrives there will be about 6,000 sailors. At any one time no more than half are allowed on shore so that means 3,000 in town. There are 3,000 bars in Pattaya so that’s one extra person per bar. So who cares.

In reality though, the sailors tend to hang around Walking Street and Soi Pattayaland 2. You’d be lucky to see a single sailor in Soi 8 or North Pattaya.

Third
During Cobra Gold no more than 200 guys get leave on any one day. The impact on Pattaya is ZERO. Usually for the last three days in late May a larger number will be given leave. Maybe a thousand or so. Impact on Pattaya - negligible.

Remember, Pattaya has a huge overcapacity of bars and ladies.

Plus, when rumors of the navy’s imminent arrival surface, thousands of girls trek down from Bangkok. That means the ratio of men to women probably improves even if the navy does turn up. If the navy doesn’t show up - which is the more common scenario - the ratio goes through the roof.

Pattaya: Big enough for all of us http://www.whythailand.net

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

The weekend rolls around. Doug is coming to town from Bangkok so I arrange to hook up with him. We meet in the hotel lobby and walk to the Sabai Land soapy massage parlor on Soi 3.

We enter and find a table. Doug has a beer - along with his main squeeze (from this place) that he’s known for years.

We all make small talk as I’m checking out the talent in the fish bowl. The girls are dressed in long gowns. They’re beautiful, but I’m uncomfortable with the meat market format. Besides, I prefer long-time as I like the GFE. I beg off saying maybe another time.

Doug and I leave (without a massage session) and decide to hit the Kitten gogo on Second road near Stardice disco. Kitten is a nice low-key gogo where I originally met Doug. It seems this is yet another favorite haunt of his (he actually had a piece of this bar but fortunately sold it sometime back).

We stay at Kitten for about two or three hours. Several times we’re the only customers (this is on a Saturday night). Buying a bar is an excellent way to make a small fortune out of a big one.

We’re having a great time with a bunch of girls sitting, singing, dancing, and drinking, buying many lady drinks and raffle tickets (I won a t-shirt).

Doug is with two of his long-time favorites. Doug’s philosophy when faced with a choice between two girls is simply to say, “Both.” (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

The Tears Were Real

I’m sitting at the hotel pool. It’s noon on an overcast day and, although hidden, the sun is still strong.

There’s more than a few unaware hotel guests basking in the sun, not fully appreciating that in about 30 minutes their pasty-white asses are going to be transformed into a painful lobster-red sunburn. Oh well, it’s their holiday.

I’m reflecting on the bargirl, “Joy”, I met the previous night. We played the usual bar games bantering with one another. I suggested going to another bar to play pool. We do so and play until nearly 2 am. I’m getting tired at that point so I ask if she wants to go to my room. She’s a little surprised as she thought I only wanted to play pool but readily accepts. Well, this is odd but let’s see what happens.

On the way to the room, Joy asks if I’m a sadist. First time I’ve ever been asked that. She’s not joking. I hope this is not going to get weird. I assure her that no, I only do software and sadism is somewhat outside my area of expertise. Unfortunately, her English isn’t quite good enough to get the joke.

We’re in the room talking (Joy’s English is good enough to converse which is why I barfined her) and the ever-present cell phone rings (Hey, it’s only 2 am). (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

Neena and Duke

The previous night I barfined a gogo girl and took her to XZyte disco. She didn’t dance. She just sat on her ass. We go to the hotel and she goes starfish. I told her it just wasn’t working out and wanted her to leave. I paid her for short time even though we didn’t even boomsing. I just wanted her to be gone.

No more gogo girls. They’re just too jaded and too used to getting something for little to no effort. (Yeah, right. Like I’m really going to follow this rule.)

So later, I’m walking around sois 7/8 at loose ends shooting pool at various beer bars. It’s somewhat late (midnight) and I’m tired. I’m thinking of just packing it in for the night. I pass a beer bar where two girls are calling out to me. I ignore them as I’m hungry and want to get something from a nearby vendor.

I stop. I have an impromptu heart-to-heart talk with myself: “Steve, why are you here in Thailand? You just passed up a gorgeous little honey wearing a tight, stretch lycra body suit with her boobs damn near falling out. Are you crazy?” I decide I’m not crazy, promptly do a 180, and walk back to the bar. (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

Evening Descends

Evening descends and I make my way to the NEP.

As I leave the Carousel gogo bar (one of perhaps 30+ such places), a waitress from there turns to me and asks if I remember her. I figure this is just a line as I’ve never seen her before, so I say “No”.

She tells me we had spoken previously and that I had promised to return in three weeks after visiting Pattaya. I pause. That’s right! I did have that conversation with a waitress from this bar.

Over a year ago. A 5 to 10 minute conversation. (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

Prologue

It must be three decades since I last did LSD.

I’ve taken LSD three times, though I never actually liked it. The big draw is that, intellectually, LSD is fascinating: it can be virtually anything you want it to be.

The same can be said about Thailand (though Thailand is a lot more fun). Kind of like the surrealistic Magic Theater scene in Hermann Hesse’s Steppenwolf. And like the Magic Theater, be careful what you wish for…

Some go to LOS to have a sex fantasy. It certainly can be had. A different girl every night. Or two or three girls - either one at a time or all together.

Other men want something more focused, the so-called Girlfriend Experience. That’s not such a guarantee, but with smarts and effort (i.e., you may have to go through four or five girls) that also can be had.

Oh, and let’s not forget about just simply getting completely shit faced and racing down a road on a rented muscle bike at 100 mph at two am.

You can live, you can die. (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

We’ve all done it. We’ve all surfed the Internet looking at Escort websites from time to time. I certainly have.

Poke around a bit on the Internet and you’ll soon come across websites for Thai escort agencies in both Bangkok and Pattaya. You’ll also see lots of escort ads in the Bangkok Post - one of two nationwide English language newspapers.

Should you or shouldn’t you… (more…)

(Courtesy of http://www.whythailand.net)

Farm Fresh refers to girls who are new to the nightlife scene. Much of what’s said about Farm Fresh girls also applies to virgins.

How do you recognize them? Well, you won’t see gold or tattoos. Little to no makeup. Sometimes they don’t even have cell phones yet!

They also won’t be dressed sexily. Think: jeans and a T-shirt. No bare midriff and no pierced belly button – or any other body part. Add in attitudes that are unassuming, modest, and reserved.

The Farm Fresh girl is the one who is hanging back in the bar. The one who is afraid to come forward and meet the strange farang.

Where can these Farm Fresh girls be found? (more…)